T-NYWTH (fiction)
July 16, 2002
Chris: Our main topic for this evening, Kris, is our commentary on the meaning of what "president" Bush calls a "fundamentally sound economy."
Kris: In other news, American military prepares for an invasion of Iraq. No one has said, in any detail, why. But various scenarios have been discussed, including one which involves as many as 300,000 American troops, and air attacks that could kill thousands of civilians.
Chris: It is hoped that Iraq will surrender to America without much force.
Kris: And it still isn't certain what America will do with Iraq. This could take years of American military presence to assure a "secure" government.
Chris: We still haven't been told why, and America hasn't really demanded it. In fact, the Pentagon didn't even want us to know about this, especially. But Americans feel secure in the reassurance that of our leaders want us to invade Iraq then it must be necessary.
Kris: The news is our gift to you, the people of the United States of America, that you may go on believing that your nation, the world's last superpower, will continue to triumph, in the war to end terrorism, and in the international markets, where America will continue to dominate trade and finance.
Chris: All news. All good news. Only good news. First the headlines.
Kris: America continues to win the "War on Terrorism." Visit our subsection, "America at War with the World," and commentary. No new terrorist attacks have occurred anywhere in the world. That makes 16 days since the last act of "terror" was committed against America and its allies.
Chris: Let us pause to remember just who we are at war against.
Kris: Who are we at war against?
Chris: We are at war with a vaguely defined enemy. "President" Bush has told us that we are at war against a "shadowy enemy dwelling in dark corners of the Earth" Lieutenant-General Dan McNeill, commander of U.S. troops in Afghanistan, has told us, "I don't have a particular name affixed to what I'm going up against." Or, as the "president" told us last year, "We will rid the world of evil [people]." The "enemy," we are told, could be anybody, and anywhere.
Kris: In news of the economy, "president" Bush today offered promises of a strong economy. He reassured us that the economy is "fundamentally sound." See our Commentary.
Chris: We don't know what "fundamentally" means here, Kris, but the president wants to assure everyone that the stock market will again be selling high.
Kris: That's right, Chris. A strong economy is one where Wall Street is selling high.
Chris: And that's the way you wanted to hear it. Tuesday, July 16, 2002.
Kris: How lucky we are, Chris, to be living in a country where Americans are free to hear the news they way they want it.
Chris: At T-NYWTH, we believe in family values and support our national unity. We believe in the strength of America. We believe that America continues to respect the rights and freedoms of its citizens. We support freedom of choice and freedom of expression. We believe America is a symbol of hope.
Kris: Join us every day as we present the news you wanted to hear. Hear us tell you how we continue to win America's war of terrorism, and America remains strong.
Chris: All news. All good news. Only good news.
fiction